Friendship – Understand You to Understand Others

Have you ever asked yourself the question – why is this person not like me? I have…LOTS!  When you’re a kid it doesn’t matter so much, but as you get older and move into more serious relationships like dating and marriage or the change that comes with adult children interacting with their parents, these things take on a magnitude they didn’t have before. These are the areas that create conflict, miscommunication and misunderstandings which if left unchecked lead to broken relationships, divorce and a lot of loneliness.

My husband and I started dating when I was quite young (he was a few years older) and at first everything was blissful. I loved that infatuation time. Neither of us hurt each other, everything was so new and exciting and we loved everything about each other….then reality hit. As we moved into a more serious, long-term dating relationship we started finding niggly things that just bothered us about each other and then there were some more serious things that had us questioning, should we even be together?Around that time we discovered a book that helped us hugely – Personality Plus by Florence Littauer.

Through reading her book we discovered that there are different temperaments, each with strengths and weaknesses which contribute to the dynamics of a relationship. As we began to understand each others strengths (and weaknesses) we began to see that the other person was not our enemy, but rather someone who just approached life differently and that was ok. We were able to give more grace when we understood the WHY – why they acted they way they did, or talked the way they did. Personality Plus saved our relationship and we’ve now been married 23 years and together 26 years.

Basically Florence describes the four temperaments as discovered by Hippocrates the
“Father of Modern Medicine”. He discovered that people tended to fall into four groups which he believed came from the amount of each of the four “humours” found in the human body so the names reflect that belief – Sanguine (red blood), Choleric (yellow bile), Melancholy (black bile) and Phlegmatic (phlegm). Now, we know better nowadays, but we still use these words to describe the four temperaments.

"Hey, how you doing? I'm great, what an awesome day..."

The first is the Sanguine – this is an extroverted, people-oriented temperament. These people are fun, exuberant, enthusiastic, love being with people, energised by groups and parties, talkative, vibrant, child-like, talk with their hands and love telling stories. Every party needs a Sanguine. The basic desire of the Sanguine is to have fun whether it be work or play and their basic emotional need is for approval and attention. The Sanguine has some corresponding weaknesses as well. As they are a talker, they can dominate conversation, become repetitive in their story-telling and be overly loud whether in speech or laughter. A Sanguine is generally not very organised, spontaneous and struggles with personal discipline – all gung-ho at the beginning and then peters out halfway through. Sanguines can appear to be insincere as they are very much “out of sight, out of mind” kind of people. When they are with you, they are very focused on you, but once you’ve left, they’ve moved to the next person. A Sanguine is often very driven by their need for approval and often become overly concerned with how they are perceived, whether physically, in their home life and other areas of their life. This drive can lead to conflict avoidance and paranoia about what others think of them. So, that’s the Sanguine!

"Grr...."

The second of the temperaments is the Choleric. Like the Sanguine, the Choleric is an extroverted temperament, but different in that the Choleric is task-oriented. The basic desire of the Choleric is for control. They are the temperament that loves to lead, thrives in leadership positions and excels in reaching goals and targets. They love to get things done, produce and work hard. The Choleric is very efficient, highly intelligent and very decisive. Cholerics are the achievers of the temperaments. They are initiators and are outgoing, though this will look different to the Sanguine out-goingness. The Choleric’s basic emotional need is acknowledgement of achievement and appreciation. They love awards and certificates and need to have appreciation expressed for tasks they have done. The Choleric is a strong temperament and because of this their corresponding weaknesses are also strong. As the Choleric desires control this can lead to controlling behaviours like bossiness, dominating, argumentative, lack of empathy and insensitivity to the needs of others. They can be workaholics as they are so driven to accomplish tasks, often struggling to relax or just take a break from their tasks. A Choleric wants the credit, is impulsive and is more likely to experience angry outbursts or become impatient and frustrated. These behaviours can make the Choleric difficult to live and work with, but once they understand who they are and others do as well, the Cholerics are high achievers and very interesting people.

"Sigh..."

The third temperament is the Melancholy. The Melancholy is an introverted temperament, but like the Choleric is task-oriented. The Melancholy’s basic desire is to be perfect. The Melancholy is an organised, detailed, methodical personality that enjoys things being done well and to a very high standard. They enjoy lists, spreadsheets and charts and routine is their best friend. They like things to be as perfect as possible. The Melancholy tends to be the artistic temperament and loves art, music and beauty. They are loyal, sensitive, thoughtful and deliberate in whatever they do. They don’t need many friends, but the ones they have they are very committed too. The basic emotional need of the Melancholy is for order and sensitivity. However, many of the Melancholy’s weaknesses stem from their desire for things to be perfect. They have high standards and become extremely disappointed in themselves or others if those standards aren’t met. Often their friends and family have no idea of the standard they are being measured against. This perfectionism can drive the Melancholy into moodiness and if left unchecked to depression. That feeling of never being good enough permeates the Melancholy world. Because people disappoint them, the Melancholy is very selective in relationships and tend to bear grudges when wronged. They naturally look on the negative side of things and struggle to believe the best of people. They are easily wounded when they feel that they have not been treated with sensitivity. However, the Melancholy has a big advantage over the other temperaments and that’s their self-discipline. Out of all the temperaments, when they understand their personality and their weaknesses in particular, they often experience the most personal growth.

"Um....hello"

The last of our temperaments is the Phlegmatic. The Phlegmatic is an introverted temperament like the Melancholy, but is people-oriented like the Sanguine. They are not outgoing, but love hanging out with people and being in social situations. They are easy going, kind, caring, consistent in their emotions, relaxing, gentle, good mediators and very soothing to the other temperaments who struggle more emotionally. The Phlegmatic’s basic desire is for peace. They’re ideal environment is one that isn’t too chaotic, is stress and conflict-free and has people in it. They aren’t the initiators, but do enjoy talking and sharing with others when asked questions or have a particular interest area. The basic emotional need of the Phlegmatic is for respect and self-worth. The Phelgmatic is not a high-achieving temperament as they are very deliberate and can be hard to motivate, so their emotional need reflects their need to be appreciated for who they are, not what they do or accomplish. The Phlegmatic is very easygoing, but that can lead to a “laissez-faire” attitude, and to laziness and procrastination. As the Phlegmatic doesn’t like conflict, this can lead to conflict-avoidance which is not healthy in relationships whether home or work. The Plegmatic tends to be unenthusiastic which is frustrating to the other temperaments and tends to not show a lot of emotion for anything – good, bad or otherwise. When pushed the Phlegmatic can get very stubborn and is incredibly hard to get them to do something they’ve decided they won’t or can’t do which can lead to conflict with other temperaments.

Well, that is a quick summary of the four temperaments. I hope you learned something about yourself and others around you. It is really important to remember that understanding the temperaments is not about putting someone in a box or trying to “tell” people what they are or should be. Rather, it is an opportunity to get to know yourself better in order to have better relationships with others. If you understand the temperaments it becomes easier to adjust how you interact with someone based on their temperament. It’s a great tool to have.

Get a copy of the book (or borrow one from Fit 4 Life) and ask us for a copy of the test. We’ve been given permission to distribute the tests by Florence Littauer so no need to worry about that (if you were :))

Have fun and feel free to contact us if you want more information.

Christy – Fit 4 Life Staff

Friendship – Being There for Others

In the last few years, I have learnt a lot about how to be there for others. I have actually learnt this in the reverse way- where I have been the one in difficulty and in need. And I have had the privilege of being on the receiving end of care from people around me when life has been difficult.

Maybe you know someone going through a tough time too? Whether it is loss of someone close, marriage breakdown, health-issues, career-change, natural disaster, family crisis, infertility, etc, we do need each other.

Here are some thoughts or things I’ve appreciated.

When there’s nothing to say, there’s nothing to say.

It is okay to say fewer things. Often this is better than blurting out things that you think will make them feel better.

Depending on what stage they are in the process, saying really positive things like quotes, verses, other happy-ending stories can be unhelpful if they are right in the deep of it and not ready for it, maybe save it for later when they are more settled. If you feel helpless and can’t find words, you can just say exactly that, that you just don’t know- that can be comforting for them too.

If you’re not sure, ask.

Ask them what is most helpful. Ask them if they want to hear positive things or not, ask them if they want help with something, ask them if there’s anything they can do, ask them if they want a meal cooked for them, etc. Then at least you have an idea where they may be at.

Questions are good because it gives them a chance to respond and take part, rather than feeling like everyone’s just going ahead and throwing help at them, when they may not want it just yet.

If they are emotional, let them be.

Crying throws a lot of us off, and so does other strong emotions like anger. Sometimes your friend may just need you to be there while you let them cry, ramble on angrily, or just sit there like a stunned mullet.

This is especially if they are in stages of grief where they are simply trying to get their heads around the situation. It isn’t always linear, so it may come unexpectedly and repeatedly. Try not to take it personally or feel too attached to what they say or do, these deep emotions will subside in time but expressing it can be one of the best things for them, though it may seem awkward or hard to hear/watch at the time.

Let them know where to find you

Some may decline help or not know how to ask for it. That is ok. Try not to hover too intensely or be their saviour.

Contact them every now and then to check in on them, so they know you are there, but you don’t have to babysit them. Ring, send a text or email so they know you are thinking of them. They will respond when they are ready.

Something is  better than nothing

If you’re not sure what to do even from the start, a simple text, email or card just to acknowledge that you are aware they are going through a tough situation or that they are in your thoughts and prayers is better than not acknowledging they are. You can also drop by a small gift of flowers or food if that is appropriate.

When bits in life seem to fall apart, it can feel strangely lonely and it is nice to know that others realise and that you have not been forgotten, so little gestures like that are much appreciated.

You’re not going to get it right!

We’re all different, and so when life is topsy-turvy, we also all respond differently. You may feel like your friend ‘should be’ processing things one way, when they aren’t. They may not respond to you like you hope, etc.

This is all very tricky stuff and there are no clear right-ways or wrong-ways (though there are healthier ways than others). Some people like life to just get on quickly as it if things are normal and that helps them, while some need a bit of time to hide in a hole before they can come out and embrace the everyday. We can keep an eye on them but we need to let them figure that out.

Encouragement and other kinds of help

There are no clear rules in terms of how long it will take for them to feel better, so just keep gently encouraging them and softly nudging them forward.

Of course, don’t be afraid to speak up if you feel they are being destructive or harming themselves. (This is hard but) we also need to be told the truth. Seek the opinion of other trusted friends if you are unsure if your view is correct. Seek professional help if you think things are going awry.

Sometimes, tough situations bring other issues to the surface that doesn’t seem related. More severe things like depression, addiction, abuse in their history, etc may be out of your realm to ‘help with’ so don’t try and handle it yourself, there are many resources out there that can do that.

Hope this helps you be there for others!!

Sarah – Fit 4 Life Staff


Friendship – Five Quotes on Friendship

I have to admit that I am more comfortable writing about Fit 4 Life’s other three topics – fitness, finances and faith – than I am writing about the topic of friendship!

It’s not that I am a bad friend… on the contrary I believe that I am a good friend to my close friends! It’s more that – for me – friendship is a very personal thing, and so writing about friendship forces me to ‘bare my soul’ in a way which the other three topics don’t.

Anyway, since it’s my turn to blog this week on the topic of Friendship, I thought I would share five of my favourite quotes related to Friendship and give a little commentary about why I like each one.

 

1. “The only way to have a friend is to be one”. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

I think many times we expect our friends to do certain things for us like calling us to say, ‘Hi’, or really listening to us when we are speaking; yet we (or maybe me!) often don’t do it to them! So this quote always reminds me that I need to continually be working on myself to be a better friend to my friends.

 

2. “A friend to all is a friend to none”. – Aristotle

An ancient piece of advice states, ‘A man of many friends comes to ruin’ (Proverbs 18:24). While Aristotle’s quote has similar implications in that you can’t be friends with everybody (Mark Zuckerberg aside!) the quote also speaks to me that true friends will pick sides and choose to rally around me. In other words, they will choose to support me when push comes to shove and even become enemies of my enemies if it is called for. Politicians and businesses might have to make strategic alliances to get along, but it doesn’t always work with friendships. A friend to all is a friend to none. I remember this and seek to be loyal to my friends at all times.

 

3. “Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes”. – Friedrich Nietzsche

Following point two above, nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes and everybody has their ‘stuff’. A good friend is not someone who is blind to, or duped by, the flaws which their friends may possess in their character and personality. However, genuine friendships overlook the shortcomings and ‘warts’ which they see in their friends. Nietzsche’s quote is a constant reminder to me to overlook the foibles and failings I see in my friends at times, because I care about them and value their friendship – and I expect the same from them too.

 

4. “True friends stab you in the front”. – Oscar Wilde

This might seem contradictory to my point about needing to overlook the foibles I see in my friends and which my friends see in me; but sometimes we have such large blind spots in our behavior that, unless they are addressed and dealt with appropriately, these blinds spots can seriously set us back in our life and in our relationships with other people.

I have a close circle of friends who aren’t afraid to point out areas in my life which they feel I need to work on – and I have the same right to speak into their lives as well. Hopefully your friends won’t be giving you a list of things that you need to be working on every week(!), but once or twice every few years my friends tell me that I am off base on some point, or that I am getting too worked up about something, or that I have misunderstood somebody and need to give them more grace, or that I failed to do something and so someone got hurt by my omission and I need to go and make restitution. Real friends are not afraid to come at you ‘from the front’ with a proverbial scalpel to help cut out from your life and character some of your bad ‘stuff’.

Oscar Wilde’s quote reminds me that true friends will address my serious character failures head-on, and they won’t whisper in the darkness with others about my failings and never come in a spirit of love to show me where I need to change. This is a great test of true friendship.

 

5. “When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand”. – Henri Nouwen

I remember one time when I happened to be on the spot in a particularly intense meeting and the object of much accusation, a person (who wasn’t even my friend!) touched my shoulder to let me know that they cared for me. That one simple act of kindness meant more to me in that meeting than any words of advice fired at me during the two hours which the meeting lasted. Being a natural advice giver, I find it very easy to start telling my friends what to do when they share a problem with me, or when they find themselves in a difficult situation. Henri Nowen’s quote is a good reminder to me that, as a friend, sometimes the greatest thing that I can do for my friends when they are in need and hurting is not to be giving them advice, but rather just to shut-up and show them love and empathy! A hug often communicates more than the most eloquent sermon…

 

Bryce – Fit 4 Life Staff


 

Friendship – Curious about Communication?

As we have all experienced, human communication and relationships are so complicated and quite fascinating really, whether it is at work, with friends or in marriage.

I was reading a friend’s blog, and she has been thinking through some things specifically to do with her personal friendships but she also posted a couple of links to interesting articles- one is ‘The Illusion of Transparency’ about how sometimes we expect or assume people know what we are thinking, and another is ‘The Spotlight Effect’ , about how we feel like others notice particular things about us and makes us feel overly self-conscious.

These struck a chord in me as I struggle with these issues myself!  Thought to share them as maybe this will also be some food for thought for you today.

Sarah – Fit 4 Life Staff


Faith – Some helpful resources

If you’re like me, it can be overwhelming the amount of information available on Christian interest subjects – from theology to parenting.

I thought I might share some of the resources I have found helpful to me in different areas of faith and life.

General Faith/Theology

One Year Bible (easy-reading and systematic so good for daily reading) 

Answers to Tough Questions– Josh McDowell (this was good for helping me understand the Bible, God and other slightly confusing things)

Evidence that Demands a Verdict – Josh McDowell (this is another great resource for answering questions about Christianity)

Marriage/Romantic Relationships:

His Needs Her Needs – Willard Harley (an essential for all marrieds, young or old)

Love Busters – Willard Harley (this book is amazing and great for all kinds of relationships, though it is written for marrieds)

For Women Only – What you need to know about the Inner Lives of Men – Shaunti Feldhahn (really important book for women to read)

For Men Only – A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women – Shaunti Feldhahn (really important book for men to read)

Personal Growth:

Changes that Heal – Henry Cloud (an awesome book that helps provide tracks to run on to see personal growth happen and to become more emotionally healthy)  

Personality Plus – Florence Littauer (all time favourite book)

Everybody’s Normal till you get to know them – John Ortberg (great read and helpful too!!)

No More Christian Nice Guy – Paul Coughlin (this is a MUST read for Christian men and a great read for Christian women too)

Parenting:

Personality Plus for Parents – Florence Littauer (great read to help you help your child grow in their temperament)

Raising Great Kids – Henry Cloud (this was a really balance book on parenting. I didn’t feel like the world’s worst mom after reading it. :))

Passport to Purity – Family Life  (this was a great tool to use to help my daughter understand becoming a teenager, purity, dating etc. Very balanced and fun)

For Parents Only – Shaunti Feldhahn and Lisa Rice (this book was so helpful as I began the adventure of parenting a teenager)

There are tons more resources out there so keep looking!! Some of these are also available to read in the coffee area of Fit 4 Life so come on down, grab a coffee and enjoy reading!!

Christy – Fit 4 Life Staff

Friendship – Love Languages

This week’s blog is on friendship or relationships.  When I sat down and thought about what I could for the blog the first thing that came to my mind was a book.  I am not big on reading non-fiction but I have found this book very useful in my marriage but also in my other relationships.  The book is “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman.  It is written more focused on marriage relationships but I think a lot of the concepts in the book can be related to other relationships as well.

It basically talks about how each one of us feels loved in different ways.  The book narrows these into five things – words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch.

I found it very helpful to learn how I feel loved and also to learn about the other ways so that I could better love others – my wife, my family and my friends.

If you are hanging out at Fit 4 Life there is a copy of the book in the book rack, feel free to take some time out to have a read of it.

Jason – Fit 4 Life Staff


Faith, Hope and Relationships

Hey friends…

Recently I have been grieving some relationships in my life with people that I love.  It has been very painful for me as relationships are so important to me.  In these moments of grief, I am learning how much I need God in my life and how thankful I am that God understands me, accepts me and loves me unconditionally.  I’ve been learning a lot about God’s grace and I am thankful that His grace is truly sufficient for me and gets me through each day.  I can trust God because I choose to believe what He says in the Bible is true and I find complete freedom and love in this choice!!

I am a person that does get disappointed easily as I have high expectations. This is something I have been learning a lot about lately and I am working on lowering my expectations to ones that are more realistic.  There’s no way I can expect the people in my life to be perfect, because after all no one is perfect except God Himself!!  But, I still get disappointed by the people I care about. I am just learning lots about how to manage that disappointment.

I wanted to share a verse that gives me hope from Romans 5:5

HOPE does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His LOVE into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us!”

So if you are going through a hard time or you are grieving relationships…know that there is HOPE and most of all that you are soooo LOVED and cared for by God and He does understand exactly what you are going through in your life. I know this from experience and not just because I read it somewhere.

Paul wrote a letter to the church of Ephesus and as you can read below, he shared one of his prayers for them which is now my prayer for you who are reading this now…

“I pray that out of God’s glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God”

If you want to know more about how you can experience this unconditional love and acceptance, then come and talk to any of the Fit4Life staff…we each have a story here too and want to help you and care for you, and point you towards knowing the greatest love that you will ever experience.

Kirstie – Fit 4 Life Staff

Friendship – Facebook and Me!!

3 years ago I came across something on the internet that revolutionised my life and my relationships – Facebook!!!

Now, some of you are probably rolling your eyes and groaning at that, but for me Facebook has been a wonderful connecting point for relationships both new and old. I had explored some other options, but Facebook just made more sense to me. I was heading overseas for a couple of years and felt that it would be a great way to stay connected to my friends here in New Zealand….little did I know how cool it would be!

While we were in the US, I found it was an awesome way to keep in touch with New Zealand friends and not feel left out of what was going on, plus it was such a great way to share our experiences through pictures and status updates and so when I returned I slotted back in. It also helped keep me from succumbing to homesickness. Now, the opposite is true. After making lots of new friends in the US, I am able to keep in touch with them. I think even more exciting has been the people I went to school with in Fiji and other parts of the world. Pretty fun to see how we all look many years later!!

For my extended family it has also been an awesome tool….my grandma is in her 80’s and has Facebook (she’s not on there much, but so cool that she is even trying). I had a cousin whom I had not seen or talked to since I was 15 years old (now 25 years later) and last year we were able to reconnect. I have loved how Facebook was able to bring my family together. Everyone of my cousins and aunts and uncles on my dad’s side of the family have FB and it is like a family reunion all the time. What a precious experience!!!

So, how do I manage FB?

  • I don’t become friends with every single person I meet or who asks…..a lot of them I do, but occasionally I don’t. My goal is not to have a zillion friends, my goal is to connect.
  • I have learned to not succumb to all the applications and things that are on FB. Most of them are just plain dumb. I do play Farmville which is a lot of fun and again has been fun to play with close friends and family. Apart from one or two things like that, I leave the applications alone.
  • I leave FB on all day as my computer is on and I am often there. This is helpful as I have people/friends living in many different time zones.
  • I just troll through the status updates to keep up with what’s going on.
  • I don’t post highly personal content on my status update – try not to criticise others and always re-read before posting as sometimes what you think is super funny or just a comment can read as a SLAM!!!!
  • NEVER, NEVER, comment on anything to do with the Twilight Series – only brings you grief!!! 🙂 (Just kidding….though everytime I have had a really bad commenting experience it has been related to Twilight)
  • Keep all my privacy settings at the highest level.
  • Keep perspective – FB is fun, it is an enjoyable way to connect with others, it is not a measuring stick of how cool I am, or how people like me.

For me Facebook has been a fantastic way to build relationships, to reconnect with people I have lost touch with and a way to stay a part of people’s lives no matter how far or close they live to me.

See you on Facebook!!!!!!

Christy – Fit 4 Life staff

P.S……Check out the Fit 4 Life Fan page on Facebook

Dating by the Alphabet – Fun Ideas for Dating

Life can be hard.  Relationships can be hard.  However, life and relationships are also a beautiful gift!!  It’s a known fact that one of the best medicines in life is a good laugh!!  For me it’s important to make time for my family and friends, to build memories, have fun and a good laugh, even through the hard seasons of life.

One of my favourite relationships in my life is my amazing boyfriend, Coops!! We both lead very busy lives but we also want to prioritise our relationship with each other too.  So other than our fun spontaneous visits and hanging out with our families and groups of friends, we have a ‘date night’ once a week (or at least this is our aim…flexibility is our friend too!!)

Coops learned of this great idea for “date night” from his mentor – “Dating through A-Z!!” We took this on board in our relationship this year and it’s really helped us to be creative and make an effort for each other, showing we care for one another while having lots of fun in the process of organizing and being on the receiving end of the surprise date too.  It’s always fun to have something to look forward to!

So, what does this look like?  Well, we alternate organising the date and whoever organises the date, pays for the date.  This helps us both to be creative and it’s not overwhelming to organise all the dates!  It also helps our pockets too as we can make it as cheap or as expensive as our budget allows for each week!  It’s been fun to incorporate ideas/places that are meaningful and significant to us, letting us learn more about each other as we do life together.

A-Z Dates so far…

Awesome gourmet burgers in Albert Park (including my favourite “Avocado) and watched an amazing film…Avatar in 3D at Skycity Cinemas.

Balloon theme! Clues for each idea for the date were inside the balloon and had to be worked out in order to move onto the next part of the evening.  Lots of encouraging B words were put inside a bundle of balloons    too and the other person had to put together the paragraph! (This turned out to be harder than I thought!! So Baking and B treats were given to make up for this. (There always seems to be a chocolate bar for every letter of the alphabet.) Bike riding around the Beaches from Okahu Bay to St Helliers Bay and up Bastion Point followed with dinner at my favourite Bar and Bistro  – “Reservoir” . We finished off with Banoffie Pie and a movie.

Candlelight dinner followed by experiencing the amazing “Chocolate Boutique” store in Parnell.  We went “caminando” (a Spanish word meaning ‘to walk’). Coops lived in Argentina and speaks Spanish fluently so Spanish is often added into the vocab of our relationship! After all that Chocolate we went up North Head in Devonport and ended up relaxing back home on the couch watching a complete dud of a movie, so we found the good old Cosby show and had some good laughs!!!!

Dominos pizza and hitting it out at the Driving Range ending with a walk down in the Domain (having very interesting talks) and delicious Dunkin Donuts for Dessert!!

Eggs Benedict cooked by my personal handsome chef Coops, and thanks to the flexibility of my man he put aside other ‘E’ plans to help me study for my Personal Trainer EXAM!!!

Fondue at ‘Fit4Life!’ (This is cooking fish, chicken, steak and vegetables in oil).  We were given Flowers from some lovely friends/cousins to enjoy for our table setting!  Later we watched a Film snacking on Frozen yoghurt and Fingers (choc) for a treat!

You may like to try this idea in a different way.  For example, try it from Z-A or spell out a special word/phrase that’s meaningful to you both or use your names/surnames, Initials…the list is endless!!  Also this idea doesn’t have to be exclusive to dating relationships, it’s something you could do with your husband/wife, daughter/son, niece/nephew, granddaughter/grandson and even just with your best mate to have some fun and build great memories together enriching your friendships and life!

So my encouragement to you is to have FUN with it!!!

Kirstie